Refuge
I recently facilitated a meeting where one of the participants shared, they were immobilized by the changes in their life since January 20th. They had no words, no actions, just stunned silence.
It has been a difficult week. I find myself stunned into silence. The world has lurched into dramatic and shocking change. At the same time, my internal world is challenged by our recent move, emotional upheavals, and energetic changes.
Silence can be terribly uncomfortable when one sits with unfelt emotions, listens to unsaid words of anger all milling about in one’s mind. Silence can also be a reliable refuge available to offer an inner sanctum.
There is so much change.
The outside static makes it difficult to surrender to the sanity in silence. Nothing can take away my inner space, my breath, my silence. It is my refuge.
A friend of mine recently posted a podcast given by Tara Brach, a Buddhist teacher entitled The Three Refuges – Gateways to Belonging and Freedom. What struck me was discovering that false refuge is part of my default to comfort myself. I reliably turn to food to find solace. Emotional eating has been part of my whole life.
I have had many versions of refuge over the years to help me cope with my life’s journey. It was a stunning realization as I made my way through this podcast, how often I have relied on false refuge to help me get through my grief and pain.
Life is a journey of learning, with its ups and downs, with remembering and forgetting while moving forward. In her podcast, she talked about the acronym RAIN. R = recognition of what is happening. A = allowing my experience to be there instead of denying it. I = investigation my emotion with interest and care. N = nurture myself with compassion.
We have a lot to learn from each other. Practicing mindful awareness helps discover behaviors that do not serve our highest and best good. We create our remedies and forget and remember because we are human.
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